Mama said there would be days like this...

Of course everyone has bad days. It's life; there's no way to avoid it. However, when living in a foreign country, little things that would be no big deal otherwise completely turn your day upside down. I know this is completely normal, but it doesn't make it any easier. Sometimes it's hard to even put words to the feelings of hopelessness when you can't read a sign or loneliness when it's 3:00 pm and there is no one in The States awake to call or being trapped at home because you have no idea how to get somewhere and are scared to get lost. Words are inadequate to convey emotions sometimes, but for those of us who are relocated for whatever reason, I have a feeling you understand. It's a conscious battle to overcome these sometimes.

This past Friday was one such day. I was scheduled to go with a group from post to a nearby botanical gardens. Not only was I going to be able to socialize with other wives, but it was kid friendly so I had kept NJ out of school to go with me. I had been keeping my eye on the weather all week and it was scheduled to be a (relatively) beautiful day. Our picnic lunch was packed, we had our jackets and shoes on and were walking out the door when I realized I couldn't find my keys. ANYWHERE. I turned our house inside out and they were no where to be found. Overwhelming feelings engulfed me: I didn't have a number of anyone I knew that was going, I didn't know where the gardens were and I had no way to get there even if I did. I couldn't even call my husband to come and get me because we only have one car and there it sat in our parking lot! I was trapped. These are moments when the magnitude of living so far away from everything you know hits you in the face. See, I told you something that would not normally be too big of a deal (can't find keys) turns into this huge reminder of other things (sometimes I feel lonely). Plus, there is nothing like a two year old reminding you with "Mommy, when are we going to the gardens?". Therefore, what's a girl to do?!? Have a moment. And I did. A big, tearful one. 

But, the beauty of living a life like ours is that you know you cannot stay in those moments forever. You know they will come, whether it's because of a deployment or a relocation, they will come. By God's grace, you will get through them. It's not by some miracle; it's by a decision (and a few prayers). Not remotely trying to say that you decide and then the day from then on is sunny. But, in my experience, it's where it starts. 

So, after I allowed myself a lonely moment, I decided there was too much happiness to be had that day to not discover it. Plus, I had NJ home with me and there were plenty of things I'd found on pinterest that I've been wanting to try with him (for those of you who are on pinterest, you will know what I mean). So, the first thing we did was make homemade paint. 

A little sugar, salt, water, cornstarch, food coloring and voila': homemade paint!

Our final product

Since we already had a picnic packed, NJ and I went up to the roof for lunch to have a picnic up there.

Once back inside, I put together 'mess free' finger painting for NJ to enjoy his homemade paint with.

NJ told me he wanted to 'draw a man' and this is what he came up with. I thought it was pretty good!

I doubt this will be the last day like this; isn't that the whole point of "culture shock"? But, wherever you might be, it is possible to make cornstarch into paint and turn a crummy day into a memorable one (this is a lesson that I will have to remind myself of as well). 

{Side note to the end of my story: Noa was able to borrow a car and come 'rescue' me. And by rescue, I mean he came home and discovered that my keys had fallen out the night before when I was lugging groceries out and were laying on the ground underneath the jeep. Yes, this entire time my keys were here all along, albeit outside. At least I was able to get an understanding hug from My Love! No matter where I am or what I might be doing, that will always make my day :) }